From my Pixnet blog: 你不再閃亮

你不再閃亮 Jun 29 Sun 2008 02:05

即使我還記得你站在光圈前為我們擋住聚光燈的那個畫面… Continue reading

From my Pixnet blog: 臨睡前送給那個我很想忘記的人

臨睡前送給那個我很想忘記的人 Jun 13 Fri 2008 01:29

我很努力的讓自己去忘記去過自己的日子 Continue reading

From my Pixnet blog: 想看就看 不想讓別人知道的我不會說

想看就看 不想讓別人知道的我不會說 Jun 08 Sun 2008 23:38


這些都是公開的地方 Continue reading

The First Cut is the Deepest

I tried so hard and it’s working. Please don’t let him spoil it all again. He’s not the first but he certainly cut it deeper then anyone else had. I loved him in a way I would never love anyone again. The euphoria we get after spending time together, walking for hours eschewing transport, talking till 5am on the phone. Just looking at each other sent shivers down my spine and I know, his. We longed to be close to each other, not just physically. He is still the only person outside of class I ever discussed, seriously not casual conversationally, Plato’s theory on the shadows and of course our never ending debates on religion.
It was too much, too unrelenting. Worse of all, it was not because I trusted him that I did not care to question. I was blind to all his faults. I forgave him for everything but I don’t think I’d ever forget. It’s a thorn in my side that I couldn’t look at him without feeling contempt for myself. I think I lost those feelings of euphoria for him a long time before I left him and he doesn’t know it. What I felt and what I feel now are lingering memories of what had been beautiful once.
True, he was there for me at some low points in my life, some of which were brought about by him and the fact that my family hated him and still hates him. We were young and we thought we were invincible. We thought love was everything. I loved him and he thought I’d change myself for him. I tried but I can’t change myself, even for him. Maybe we were growing up in different directions and he saw it coming, he tried to push me back to his path. I am still not the the kind of person he wants me to be, even in my now more conventional job I will never be the kind of person he hopes I will be.
I see his messages and I hate myself for responding. I can’t believe I let myself sink so low then, making myself into someone I am not. Even more for the ‘rebellion’ after, the smoking, the swearing and worse of all the abandon with which I dated other people.
I have been trying to forget, leading my new life with someone else. Yet he just calls and my walls come tumbling down. Leave me alone please. I want this relationship to work even with all the problems. I want him more then I you. I do love him more then you right now. I might not love him as I once loved you but I don’t love you anymore.
I would have given you all of my heart
but there’s someone who’s torn it apart
and she’s taking almost all that I’ve got
but if you want, I’ll try to love again
baby I’ll try to love again but I know Continue reading



這麼多年來一直努力讓自己堅強。太多的保護色,好像漸漸地忘記自己其實還是會受傷。因為不敢哭,所以傷一直埋在裡面,一直沒有痊癒。好想抱住一個人痛哭,但是又找不到可以依賴的人。 Continue reading

新聞台: 不是甚麼都可以挽救的


她才意識刀自己的瘦受傷了 Continue reading


而愛情本來就是種考驗 當耗盡所有激情與好奇 上天給人們一些小甜蜜和一卡車難題

這就是人生?只有莫名其妙、沒有邏輯的偶像劇裡面的人才會那麼費力的談戀愛吧… 親愛的我累了,不只是因為距離,而是我對愛情沒有信心。 我可以相信一個人,但是我沒辦法相信人性。 Continue reading

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